1. Wear clothes of two colors: your choice of black or white

2. Own a cellular phone ....

3. Have only Asian friends

4. Speak only in Asian languages

5. Dress as though you're headed for a party when you're actually going to class

6. If you're a girl, BE SURE TO STUFF YOUR BRA

7. If you're a guy, BE SURE TO SOUP UP YOUR ACURA INTEGRA

8. Smoke even if you don't know how to, especially if you're with friends

9. Travel only in droves of 10 and above to parties

10. Refuse to dance to anything but techno music

11. Whenever in droves of 10 or more Asians, stare menacingly at all other Asians

12. Dance in circles at all parties and clubs

13. If you're a girl, BE SURE TO RUN YOUR FINGERS THROUGH YOUR HAIR EACH TIME YOU SEE A HOT GUY

14. Wear only designer labels

15. Make sure designer labels are extremely visible. Better yet, make sure that the make is emblazoned on the front of the apparel

16. Own a pair of Doc Martens

17. Be very good at pool. Own a cue stick if you can, even if you know nothing about them

18. Make sure your parents are doctors, or better yet, grocery store owners

19. Own a sports car

20. Make sure you install every possible option you can in your car

21. Date only someone that a friend of yours has already dated (in another words... recycle your girlfriends)

22. Be a Christian pretending to actually care about the religion

23. Use church as a social ground to meet potential dates

24. If you're a guy, make sure your hair looks like the head of a circumsized penis

25. If you're a guy, don't be embarassed that your penis is small. Instead, simply make sure that its size is inversely related to the loudness of your car engine

26. If you're a girl, don't be embarassed about your small chest. Instead, make sure that its size is inversely related to the amount of make up on your face

27. If you're a girl, weigh no more than 75 lbs.

28. If you're Korean girl, have eye surgery done so you can look like a goldfish

29. If you're in a group of 10 or more friends, stare menacingly at all interracial couples you see.

30. If you're a guy, start having insecurities and complain about the "theft" of your women

31. If you're a girl... well, Asian men never date interracially anyway

32. Have wispy pubic hair

33. Have a sports car that is lowered that it scrapes the road when you drive it.

34. Believe in credit cards....especially when they belong to others.

35. Girls: call each other bitch. Guys: call each other bitch.

36. Make sure the clubs you go is predominately asian: that is 96% asian and the other 4% are the whites being beaten up for macking on asian chicks

37. Join a dumbass Korean gang and get the same haircut, the same baggy suit, and wear a black sunglasses. Curse in Korean all day.

38. Join a dumbass Vietnamese gang and get the same haircut, the same baggy jeans, and wear a white T-shirt. Curse in Vietnamese all day.

39. Join a dumbass Chinese gang and get the same haircut, the same tight jeans, and wear a white T-shirt. Curse in korean all day.

40. Curse about how you're Japanese-American and can't join any of these dumbass gangs cause there aren't any Japanese around in the first place.

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1. you know you're an azn if....  
2. you know you're a korean if....  
3. perfect asian parent....  
4. perfect asian child....